Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Send Me - Our Journey to our New Son

The world is a mess, falling apart.  
Senseless suffering.

There are so many things I can't do.  
I can't single-handedly fight a war or change political policy. 

But I refuse to believe I can't do anything. 
I won't give up hope that there is good in the world.

There are things we can do, today.
Today, there are children around the world who are alone. 
I can't change that for all, but I can change that for one.

"Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?' And I said, 'Here am I. Send me!'" (Isaiah 6:8)

So, here we go again. We're heading back to China!
Here's the story of our new son:

Through both processes to bring our girls home, we have changed, grown and stretched so much in terms of our faith.  We've learned that the children who need families are not defined by their special needs. They are human and they need love. That's all.

We've also learned things that we can't unlearn:

  • There are so many more boys waiting in China than girls. 
  • Boys are often overlooked for girls.  
  • Being a boy over the age of 2 or 3 is a special need in and of itself. 
  • When kids in China turn 14, they are no longer eligible for adoption and face a life of very uncertain terms.  Employment, education, social acceptance etc. are very unlikely for orphans who have aged out.

When we went to Maggie's orphanage, we saw things we can't unsee:
  •  Children everywhere, stuck in their cribs for most of the day.
  • Boys, girls, many, many special needs. 
  • They were starving for food, love, attention.
  • Few workers, few toys and little love.
  • It was dark, quiet and devastating.  
  • We also saw many people with special needs on the streets begging, because they were not given the opportunity to go to school, get a job and be treated equally.

The seed was planted in the back of our minds.

In the meantime, life was crazy, hectic, busy and overwhelming with 4 kids of varying needs.

As a member of many online adoptive groups, I see dozens of children listed every day who desperately need a family.  Countless times I would show Jeremy their faces, talk about their story and pray for them.  Some would stick in my mind for a while, but it's hard to remember them all.  Summer of 2014,  I saw the face of a little boy pop up. He caught my eye and I shared his pictures and video with Jeremy.  He melted our hearts, but after we saw how great his physical need was, we decided we couldn't handle all that he would need. 

Every so often, his face would pop up again and I couldn't get him off my mind. I tried advocating for him myself for a while. This past summer (2015), we requested his file to get more information. We had a leading doctor who specializes in his need go over his file (which he kindly did for free!) and got a better idea of his needs. But when we heard the word "wheelchair" we once again shut down any possibility of us bringing him home.  We just thought there was no way we could handle a child who was at times reliant on a wheelchair. We thought the decision was final, and continued to pray for  him.  

But something happened after we made that decision. I was sad. I felt lost. I couldn't explain it. Rationally in my mind, I knew our hands were full. I knew the decision was made. So I went through a period of trying to focus on the kids we had and enjoy our life.  And it was good for a while.

But God wasn't done yet. After a series of major "ah-ha" moments, we realized that we were limiting God's power. That we were making our decisions based on worldly beliefs instead of Godly beliefs.  

We couldn't get this one particular boy out of our mind for a reason. 
He stood out more than any other face we've seen-
because he's our son.

Previously we had focused on our fears:
  • His special need is rare and severe. 
  • He'll need surgeries, therapies, castings and extra help.
  • Our plates would be too full.  
  • We had no money for another adoption.

In time, though, we began to only see the Truths:
  • He is a treasured child of God.
  • He needs a family.
  • We are immensely blessed.
  • We have a lot of love to share.
  • God will equip us.

We only get one chance at this life.  I want to live it to the very fullest of God's potential. I want to live it with open, willing hands.  I want to be a part of God's larger than life plan.

Now we view this sweet face as our son. We love him and are racing through paperwork to bring him home as soon as possible.  He has already lived over 7 years without a family.  This time is different from our first two processes: because he waited for so long without a family, we were matched with him first  and are now starting from scratch on all the paperwork.

His needs do not define him nor will they break us. In fact,we know they'll strengthen us.  We are going to be immensely blessed by him joining our family, just as we were blessed by Allie and Maggie. 

We are beyond excited.  Join us on our journey to bringing Joey home!

 "Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?' And I said, 'Here am I. Send me!'" (Isaiah 6:8)

Send Me.


  1. He's absolutely precious!!! Congratulations! :D :D

  2. Oh what a treasure! And I TOTALLY GET what you are saying. We're in that same spot with our Little Miss that we argued with ourselves about for nearly two years. Glad we all finally got the message! :) Congrats to your family.